-my -ny: June 2009

Sunday, June 14, 2009

When I was high school I would hear random gossip about people who I wasn't friends with. How so and so got with someone because they were drunk or high. I would always think to myself how stupid so and so was, embarrassing themselves in front of others who they thought were their friends. I thought I was above the influence, better than them because I didn't do any of those things.
How naive and silly I was. To think that I could be better than that. Ultimately I can only blame myself for not caring enough to keep myself in check. I'm stupid. When the guy I was interested in offered I accepted. Nothing happened with the guy but I continued to do it. When to stop? It's crazy how as an 18 year old I think that I can't possibly die. I know that death is inevitable but what's the possibility of it happening now? Seeing all those totaled cars off the Manhattan Bridge, knowing that the drivers died on impact, instantaneously, scares me. Yet I still speed when I drive on the highway. It's easy to forget reality.

So when do you stop?